An Unexpected Lesson On Love.

Last week I served as “Principal For A Day” at Stephen Decatur Middle School. It’s a yearly initiative to strengthen partnerships between the schools and community leaders, local businesses, and non-profits.

This year marked my fourth serving as Principal and each year has been an enlightening experience. As Principal, I’ve sat in on building planning meetings, observed classroom instruction, been on hall duty, and seen my fair share of lunch duty as well. Each school and experience has been different, all providing a unique perspective on the challenging role of the Principal and the innovative ways in which we can support our local schools.

I arrived at 7:45, was warmly greeted and then whisked away to a meeting with the principal and teachers, quick break, meeting with the principal and parents, class observations, lunch duty, tours, etc.; trust me, the Principal’s job is not easy by any stretch of the imagination. In terms of logistics, the day was quite similar to previous years but the lesson on love was not expected. I’m always amazed by the lessons we learn unexpectedly when we pay attention.

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.”

— (Proverbs 18:21, NKJV)

1.       How do you refer to those you love? The children are referred to as scholars. This is major because a scholar is a distinguished academic, a person who is highly educated or has an aptitude for study. When the Principal, teachers, staff, etc. refer to the students as scholars, they are speaking over their lives. They are reminding the children of what they are capable of and declaring their greatness.

Lesson: Speak life and call things as though they were.

2.       How do you encourage those you love? During a math class observation, a student expressed difficulty in solving a problem. The teacher took the time to walk through the problem further and while doing so asked the scholar to explain where he ran into trouble. The student’s voice was quite low (possibly because there were a few visitors in the room) so the teacher provided encouragement, gently saying, “Share your voice.” Short and sweet but it was enough to remind the scholar that the classroom is a safe place and of the importance of speaking up and being heard.

Lesson: Be gentle with your words.

“The soothing tongue is a tree of life” (Proverbs 15:4, NKJV)

3.       How do you correct those you love? As we transitioned from one meeting to the next, classroom to classroom, etc. there were a few times where students were being a little too loud or not moving quickly enough to make it to their next class in time. The real Principal asked them over gently and reminded them of what they were in school to accomplish. When further discipline was necessary, the Principal explained the course of action.

Lesson: There should always be love, even in correction.

“My dear child, don’t shrug off God’s discipline, but don’t be crushed by it either. It’s the child he loves that he disciplines; the child he embraces, he also corrects” (Hebrews 12:5, MSG)

First Quarter Ending...

We’re approaching the end of the first quarter of the year. Where do you stand? Before you answer that, stop and think about all that you’ve accomplished. I know, you’d rather think about what you said you would do and didn’t or all that lies ahead but please resist. No accomplishment is too small. Where did you make progress? What steps did you take to accomplish your goals? How much more time have you made for family? Where did you use your gifts to serve? What obstacles did you overcome? Have you matured in an area of your life? Did you make better decisions regarding your finances? And more importantly where did God show up? Think about it. Instead of lamenting over the work that still needs to be done, take a few moments to ‘Celebrate Your Wins’ if I may quote my sisters over at DIVAS, MPH.

Far too often we neglect the opportunity to be grateful for the little things and in most cases, it’s the small wins that propel us in the future. The smallest changes typically have the most lasting impact and drastically affect our families, networks, and perspectives. We want more and I get it but let’s recall Jonah’s ungrateful tendencies and where it got him. Instead of Jonah being grateful for God’s message, he was frustrated because he had his own plan and thoughts on how things should have progressed. God showed mercy over and over again as well as discipline/correction. Let’s not end up tossed in the sea or out in the beating sun because we’ve neglected to simply be grateful. (Jonah 4:5-11)

So today, take a few moments to celebrate. Be grateful for what God has shown you and the leaps you’ve made in the first quarter. Then, get back to work! Reassess the goals you’ve set, check your motives, and if you need a boost, check out Reset!

If hurt people, hurt people then...

Last night I held part one of my 3-Part Impact Series on Forgiveness and it was a blessing to share some of the things I’ve learned on my journey to forgiveness. I’m still learning and growing and as I do so I will continue to share.
 
“Hurt people, hurt people." We’ve heard this before but what about people that have been healed? What do they do?

Healed people, heal people.

 

This healing of others is accomplished either directly or indirectly. What else could one possibly do with the healing but heal others? Even if indirectly, once you’re healed from whatever wounds you might have had, it shows. Your mental and spiritual posture is different, your attitude is more pleasant, you love harder, laugh longer, celebrate others, etc. Your presence is a blessing. Your smile lights up the room and when you ask someone how they’re doing, they sense that you care because you do. And why do you care? Because you no longer bare loads of unforgiveness, anger, resentment, etc. which means you have the capacity to actually care about others.

In turn, you begin to more positively impact those around you. They notice something different in you, they see the way you treat others, the way you treat yourself, the way you respond to those that hurt you – or more importantly the way you don’t respond! And they too want it even if they don’t know what to call it. People start asking questions like “Why are you so happy?”  “How did you two become friends again?” “Wait, you’re no longer angry about…?”
 
So I encourage you to focus on healing. For those making grand list of New Year’s resolutions, which I highly discourage (maybe I’ll share why in a separate blog post), I pray that you will at least focus on healing for yourself. We can’t restore, retain, focus, achieve, etc. until we heal.

Let's get to work!

Ready to forgive???  To receive more details or to sign-up for the next series, click here.

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